If I can loose two pounds this week I will reach 50!! I really want to make it to -50 this week. I know it wont be the end of the world if I don't but I really hope I do. I talked yesterday about how happy I was when I saw my shadow and I also said how easy it is for me to go the other way and HATE my body. Today at my co-worker's baby shower and as we were leaving I heard someone say, "When are you due?" I thought she was talking to me. Suddenly all my fear and body hate came rushing back. I wanted to just cry. Then I realized...she was talking to my co-worker who is 8 months preggers not me. It is amazing how quickly all those old fears can come rushing back. I hope as I loose more weight and get used to a smaller body I will have less and less of these episodes and learn to be ok in my own skin.